Your Perfect Zoom Date Deserves a Great Shirt

"Does this shirt match my wall?" is a question I never thought I'd ask myself. Then again, I never expected to weather a global pandemic in my studio apartment with a singular can of Lysol spray as my prized possession. So the shirt thing? Really, it's the least of my problems. But I love making it a big deal, pulling sweaters and blouses out of my closet, throwing them over my braless body (haven't worn one of those in a month!), and testing them out in front of a webcam like I'm about to snap a 2008 Myspace profile picture.

Let me explain. Once upon a time, I played the dating game. My outfits were the pieces I moved across the chessboard. The photographer that wanted to meet up at a dive bar? Saw him there in my Levi 501s. That European guy with an ambiguous job and a reservation at an overpriced downtown hotspot? As long as my Rotate minidress and I weren't paying. The startup bro who was sooo busy and could only grab a drink at 9:30 on a Tuesday? He definitely wasn't looking for anything serious, but I foolishly entertained him in my Vince slip dress for months.

That was in 2020 B.C (before corona.) Now, I'm not even meeting my delivery guy in person, let alone a suitor. But, somehow, I can't shake my aesthetic association with romance and fashion, even as dates shrink to a screen. So on Friday nights, I set up a video call and prop my laptop up on a crooked pile of coffee table books. Then, I comb through my closet, seeking sartorial solace while my television blares and sirens wail in the background. For a few seconds, I'll forget my reality. I'm just a girl, who likes a guy, and has the perfect top to show it.

A month into quarantine, I've made my fair share of digital dressing mistakes (a white button down against a white wall, FYI, looks like you're in a panic room) as well as some successes (spoiler alert: polka dots.) Below, 16 suggestions on what to wear for a Zoom date. Here's to finding love in a hopeless place.

Neutral as the New Normal

"I'm just going to wear something that looks like I could have been wearing it all day," my friend Adriana texts me before a recent date. She's got a point. An hour ago, you were lying on your couch with a bowl of popcorn, replying to work emails with "I hope you are staying safe!" You know it, and your date knows it, because they were likely doing the exact same thing. So a flattering neutral, that can transition from Zoom meeting to Zoom date, is a practical and versatile virtual choice.

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Marine Serre crescent moon top

$333.00, THE WEBSTER

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Awake Mode faux-leather tank

$192.00, BROWNS FASHION

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Reformation silk blouse

$150.00, BROWNS FASHION

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Totême ribbed bodysuit

$200.00, NORDSTROM

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Fun Basics

Honestly, if you're going to buy anything right now, it should be a sweatshirt. The price per wear will probably boil down to, like, five cents. So with those economics mind, get one of these! They're cozy and the colors will pop on your screen. Plus, they're perfect for remotely watching Netflix together.

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John Elliot tie-dye sweatshirt

$398.00, FWRD

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Rejina Pyo spilt-back sweatshirt

$380.00, NORDSTROM

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Proenza Schouler tiger-print long-sleeve T-shirt

$350.00, PROENZA SCHOULER

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Isabel Marant Zewel graphic T-shirt

$202.00, FARFETCH

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Interesting Necklines

If you're like me, and the best lighting in your apartment is against a blank white wall, you're going to need some visual variety. So try out an asymmetrical neckline—and maybe even show off a shoulder to spice things up.

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Ninety Percent one-shoulder tank top

$35.00, BROWNS FASHION

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Jacquemus hot-pink top

$262.00, MYTHERESA

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Johanna Ortiz one-shoulder shirred top

$495.00, BROWNS FASHION

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Simon Miller orange ribbed one-shoulder tank

$125.00, NORDSTROM

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Bright, Bold, and Busy

Throw on a goofy zoom background (tropical Island is my favorite) and wear a playful pattern to match. Do a Tiger King theme night and don some animal print. Basically, have fun with it! It'll break up the monotony of your day—and likely, your dates as well. Case in point: last Friday night, I sat down in front of my camera only to have my date exclaim: "Polka dots! Wow, I like polka dots!" These days? It's the little things.

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Molly Goddard floral mesh top

$360.00, NORDSTROM

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Zimmermann polka-dot yellow blouse

$550.00, NEIMAN MARCUS

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Veronica Beard leopard-print blouse

$395.00, SHOPBOP

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Beaufille striped turtleneck

$335.00, SHOPBOP

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Originally Appeared on Vogue

Best of: John Mulaney | Netflix Is A Joke

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